Some of you may
wonder why I haven't published more of my mother's stories, Wenonah's stories,
in this blog. I've been feeling guilty about that, and so I may as well come
clean. It's because they're in the book. When I started writing this blog, it
seemed like I was almost finished with the book, but writing a book takes a
long time, at least it has for me, so I'm still just teasing you with stories
about peripheral events and background history.
Now it does seem
like the end is in sight. That's the reason I've been neglecting the blog
lately. I've been spending most of my time editing my manuscript to get it
ready to send to the publisher.
Dividing my time
between writing the book and the blog has given me an appreciation for the
values of both. On the one hand, in the book I can show how the events in the
lives of my mother's family fit together, how they combined to make them the people
they were. It's only by knowing in detail the joys, the obstacles, and the
tragedies they faced, that you could ever hope to understand them.
I've always enjoyed
listening and telling stories, but a short story only gives you a snap shot of
a person. Now that I've worked so hard to tell my mother's story, I appreciate
more the importance of putting stories into context. It's helped me to
understand my mother better - her whole family for that matter, and I want to
leave that understanding, limited as it still is, to my children, to the rest
of our family, and to whoever else wants to read about us.
Now for the
advantages of a blog. The most painful struggle I've had in writing this book
is having to leave things out. To me every story, every little fact about our
family is interesting. I have boxes of pictures, documents, letters. I have
hundreds of hours of taped interviews with my mother, and I've read dozens of
books to learn about the historical, political, and social background for our
story, but I just can't put all that into the book. As interesting as it all
is, putting it in would destroy the continuity, the drama, but I can put it
into the blog, and now that I know what's going to be included in the book,
perhaps I won't be so stingy about sharing facts that are peripheral to the main
story.
Also once you get
to know Uncle Haskell, or Uncle Tom, or Grandmother by reading the book, it
should be more interesting to learn more about them.
The most important
person in my mother Wenonah's life was her mother, Victoria. I knew Grandmother
only in her later years, and although I spent a lot of time with her, I never
saw her as the inspiration, and the tower of strength that she was to my mother.
Grandmother taught her children with proverbs, and I've tried to collect some
of them, both proverbs and also some colloquialisms, as my mother, Wenonah told
them to me.
Beggars
can't be choosers.
Willful
waste makes woeful want.
Mamma said that when Roosevelt put dye in potatoes and paid farmers to destroy
hogs.
Still
waters run deep. Refers to people who are wise but speak
little.
I
did very well by my supper.
Mamma would say after a hearty meal.
When
you pour, pour! Mamma said when she was teaching me to pour.
(My mother quoted this to me when she
was trying to get me to get to the point when I was telling a story.)
Mamma never did whine. In spite of what she
had to go through. She was always trying to figure out how to get along. And
she didn't let us whine. This was her phrase:
I'll give you something to whine
about. That's one of her phrases
that's glued to my memory. And we weren't allowed to tattle either. Me and Bob
would tattle on each other and then we'd both get a whipping
The
Rooshuns. That's how Mamma pronounced
Russians. Also she pronounced her a's as er's, and er's as a's, so my sister
Oteka was "Teker," and her sister Ada was "Ader." Her
brother Luther was "Lutha," and vinegar was "vinega."
Mamma's toast was: Up to my mouth and down to my toes where
many quarts and gallons go.
A
giggling girl and a cackling hen never can come to a good end.
He=s a
fool for the want of sense.
(My mother made this comment about a cousin of mine who pretended to be smarter
than everyone else.)
A
fool and his money are soon parted.
A
house divided against itself cannot stand. Mamma would say this when we=d fight with each other.
So and so is more to be pitied than censored
You
can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear.
Pretty
is as pretty does.
If
you don't act like a lady people won't treat you like one.
When
two or three are gathered together I will grant their requests.
The
sins of the fathers are visited on the sons.
If
you lay down with dogs you're going to get fleas.
Blood
is thicker than water
Oh,
for pity's sake.
Birds
of a feather flock together.
A watched pot never boils.
I
wouldn't have given a plugged nickel forC
Mamma would also say AI don=t love ...@ instead of saying she didn't like
something.
If Mamma called someone
"old" it meant that she was mad at them, or didn't like them. She
called her sister "Old Sis" when she opposed her marriage to Pappa.
It's
a long lane that knows no turnings. Is a quotation from Robert Browning's
poem, The Flight of the Duchess. Mamma used it to mean that people get their
just deserts.
Wheels
within wheels. Mamma used
to refer to complicated political or social situations.
Leave
well enough alone
A
friend in need is a friend indeed.
Mamma used the expression Plotting against the British in
reference to my brother Haskell checking on us to see if we were talking about
him. It refers back to the revolutionary war when the colonists had to be
careful what they said around the British.
Your damned old Daddy. The only curse word that Mamma ever used.
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